confused feeling of being used

bobby g

Well-Known Member
#61
Now im understanding why his mum said she under stands quite well what im talking about.
he's just like his da, I told him u go back home ill take ur mum instead, she miserable as my mum
they live in some what of old ways, woman stay home, cook, clean, do chores and goes no where unless the man takes her places, she stays put until told can leave etc.. that is way too old, told him if that's what he wanted han he should have married a Tunisian woman. I don't believe that any more back than it was how it is this is 2011 not 1950:
I have health ins on him but he takes responsibity on the balance, I know he doesn't like it but oh well, he's not king tut like he thinks he is, told him don't like it move out, whats keeping u.
Im not begging u to stay, I do not wait on him hand and foot etc,, he gets off his lazy bum and does things for himself hey we both work welcome to america we all work together there's no his or her job titles in my house we all work as a unit.
I did write a letter to immigrantion telling them of how he changed what he's said etc
Sorry Catbou, but for the life of me I can't see why you feel you have to carry on with this marraige. You do not seem happy, your husband does not seem happy. Maybe it's time you called it a day.
 

bobby g

Well-Known Member
#62
If thats the best you can say..then maybe it's best you just stay silent. I don't know why you feel you have to antagonise everyone. Grow up and get a life....if things are'nt going well in your life don't take your frustrations out on others.
 

catbou

Member
#63
If thats the best you can say..then maybe it's best you just stay silent. I don't know why you feel you have to antagonise everyone. Grow up and get a life....if things are'nt going well in your life don't take your frustrations out on others.
I'm not taking my frustration out on others I needed some advice from other tunisians since he keeps using the excuse its how we treat our woman. I can for life of me belive someone can change so fast and maybe it the shock of how things turned and I'm trying to understand things before I make a choice, u don't understand crap until u walked in some one elses shoes
And if I bother u so much, whom told u to take the time to read then answer
For ur info papers been filed. Thank u so kindly
 

catbou

Member
#64
did i mention my husband is in the police, you piece of filth?
I never said all tunisians are bad I have wonderful friends from there
To keep the books straight I knew my husband two years with out sex before we married, I do not beileve in sex before marriage but as this thing. Of a man talks it shows how most tunisian men are, no wonder their woman are frustrated some look to other woman for comfort. It just shows you really don't know a person until you live and or marry them and for that so called mans info, even though were going through problems he would have no problem knocking the crap out of you, for even speaking to me in that manner.
All that man shows men from there ,some not all, are control freaks and little boys that makes threats and throw a fit when they don't get their way. I do know my husband needs to grow up as from my beilfs not divorce unless adultry happens.
When he's not throwing his fits , he's. The man I fell in love with. Mind u I was not looking for a mate just friends and it end up growing into something more, maybe he has a false sence of how things should be who knows, once their minds made up nothing will change it.
 

Steffi

Active Member
#65
Have I taken too many painkillers today?....As I do not understand this at all...:confused:
 

crazypink

Well-Known Member
#66
did i mention my husband is in the police, you piece of filth?
As far as im aware a tunisian who is in the police cannot marry a foriegn woman. He can resign and then marry but not while he is still in the police force.
 
#67
I'm not taking my frustration out on others I needed some advice from other tunisians since he keeps using the excuse its how we treat our woman. I can for life of me belive someone can change so fast and maybe it the shock of how things turned and I'm trying to understand things before I make a choice, u don't understand crap until u walked in some one elses shoes
And if I bother u so much, whom told u to take the time to read then answer
For ur info papers been filed. Thank u so kindly
Catbou, I think Bobbyg was replying to that sideline discussion with someone else and comments were not directed at you.
 
C

Cas

Guest
#68
Have I taken too many painkillers today?....As I do not understand this at all...:confused:
Phew glad it`s not just me.....as a mod I like to read through most posts but truthfully some send my brain into close-down, complex lives or what? thinking in a convoluted fashion to justify a partners behaviour maybe?.......
 

lainie

Well-Known Member
#69
catbou, are you "proud's" wife?
 
C

Cas

Guest
#70
Phew glad it`s not just me.....as a mod I like to read through most posts but truthfully some send my brain into close-down, complex lives or what? thinking in a convoluted fashion to justify a partners behaviour maybe?.......
Apparently we have White Ribbon Day to highlight the violence between men and women and a school in Radcliffe on Trent Notts has won a national award for the work they have done towards understanding and identifying this violence, so what are women doing to prevent putting their children in this type of situation when it`s so prevalent?
 

Jane BM

Well-Known Member
#71
Apparently we have White Ribbon Day to highlight the violence between men and women and a school in Radcliffe on Trent Notts has won a national award for the work they have done towards understanding and identifying this violence, so what are women doing to prevent putting their children in this type of situation when it`s so prevalent?
not enough i think is the answer!!
 

bobby g

Well-Known Member
#72
I'm not taking my frustration out on others I needed some advice from other tunisians since he keeps using the excuse its how we treat our woman. I can for life of me belive someone can change so fast and maybe it the shock of how things turned and I'm trying to understand things before I make a choice, u don't understand crap until u walked in some one elses shoes
And if I bother u so much, whom told u to take the time to read then answer
For ur info papers been filed. Thank u so kindly
Catbou, I think you have the wrong end of the stick...I was not refering to you in that quote. The previous quote was directed at you...as in I don't understand why you are continuing in the relationship as from what you have shared on here it does not see to be a very happy situation. However it's your situation and your choices to make. But if you say things on a forum in such a way to invite comments or seek information then you will get all sorts of responses...based on personal experiences and opinions, some you will like some you probably will not. That's life.

Anyway good luck with your paperwork and good luck in the future.
 

sylviachoudry

Active Member
#73
oh my not been on for a while ,but thats good kept my intrest ha ha , sorry catbou not making joke of you but the idiot who came on as a tunisian man ha ha ,f*** f*** me thinks you pass your english test with an A+, catbou maybe your hubby is gay thats why he brings it up as bad in his talk about his friends ,tunisians dont like gays and keep away from being classed as infeminet , you can realy hurt there feelings calling them gay, its an insult to them as a man, its a muslim thing, maybe he is and has a complex about it , not saying he is just a thought, nice to be back syl xxx
 

maynardlynne

Well-Known Member
#74
As far as im aware a tunisian who is in the police cannot marry a foriegn woman. He can resign and then marry but not while he is still in the police force.
this is true what u say....
 

ines

New Member
#75
its really sad and strange story... Or i must say strange guy.... He must have got some problem in his mind definitely, or hiding something for sure, sorry to tell you that, but he's hiding something for sure. Married an not sleeping together. You away for 2 weeks he don't even call or text to see if you are still alive, good health or need anything. What is this.. Sorry but he's strange cos he doesnt care at all about you. Which kind of person do this.. He doesn't have heart, the guy work and when off go with or sleep all day. and wake up go on the laptop... Euh is this a married couple sorry my dear but no.. Days off must be spend together. go out shopping, cinema or theatre.. then having dinner nice restaurant, both happy. And also why not meet his friends or yours for a coffee or lunch or anythingelse. And when you are home as normal couple sleep same bed as husband and wife, then he can be on laptop but not 24/7 and avoiding you... You must cook something for him eat both together laugh and talk and speak about your days, and how are your both families and all that. You have to force him to talk, change, share things with you as marrier otherwise im sorry, but this guy for me he's good to throw in the bine.. Be clever please cant you see his behaviour, his behaviour means everything, im 24 and im not married yet. pfffffff marriage but no choice i will have to. Think look at your situation, i don't wana be against him, but his behaviour with you and how he is with you, its not good at all, he's hiding something or have another wife or girlfriend somewhere's for sure. Sorry to tell you that but with situation like this u know that everything can happen, and a guy who doesn't want his own women, guy stay guy so understand... Just open your eyes or change him or better to over it now. And you can change him, a women can change a guy, i know a person who change a guy, im really proud of her, but you can change him... Anyway good luck i really really hope everything gonna change. Speak with him you have to... Good luck. I will come back to see ur next comment about what you done.xxx
 

SJK

Active Member
#76
Catbou, I know I'm a little late coming into this conversation but I had to say that I'm very sorry that you are in this situation.

Regarding his refusal to help clean in the house cos 'Tunisian men don't do this', well I find that confusing. When me and my fiance are together we cook together, then I wash and he drys the dishes. Also, he does most of the cleaning when I go in the shower each morning (I take 30 minutes so he's got the time lol) We have an equal relationship...50/50. Its what we've always agreed on. And don't you feel unloved not sleeping with your husband? I know 'jiggy jiggy' (I love this expresion :)) is not just what a relationship is about but it is important to share that special time together.

With your first posts I understand that you were fed up with him and wanted him to be deported but now it seems your still wanting him there? As when he's not having fits he's the man you fell in love with? Hunnie, I'm sorry but I think this love is one sided and its not from his side.

I hope everything works out for you, not just for you but for your boys. They deserve to be brought up in a happy loving home and they need to see that a relationship is about love, trust and respect. So when they enter relationships they are aware that woman are not doormats to be used and abused.
 
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