Does anyone know how to deal with Love Rats/Players/Losers/Bezness boys

maria1

New Member
hi babsi
i have posted twice, i am new here. You sound like a sensible lady and i feel for you. As you say 10yrs is nothing! In one way the child has complicated things, as you would have had more time together, to get to know if this was right, but then it seems that you want this child and good luck to you. It does seem however that he wasnt thinking along these lines, strange, as I have this assumption that all young tunisian men want family and children, maybe i am wrong. I think you are very brave and i hope so much that your relationship continues, not so easy when prenant eh? I wish you all the best, take care
 

maria1

New Member
love rats continued

I tried to post a quick reply, but it seems to have got lost.
I think it is very very sad thatthee are such desperate peole out there, desperate for whatever are their reasons, to lie and cheat and get into a position that they THINK OR BELIEVE will be better for them. Okay we all want to try to better ourselves, all want to try and get out from a negative situation, but for young men to believe that by lying and cheating and manipulating a woman, he will bring about his own happiness. He wont, it cant happen, when things are not right, not genuine, it cant bring about happiness, it may well bring about change, and perhaps thats all these young guys are looking for, change and a chance to move on. This then is very sad for the women that they use, and yes, i realise its mainly the older women. Again perhaps a bit of desperation, time on their hands, lonely, a little money to spend, VULNERABLE. Surely common sense should come into the arena. I see nothing wrong with age difference, whatever the ***, orientation, class, race, religion, culture, all of these taboos can be overcome if two peole genuinely love each other. This is the crux of the matter, although we all have reasons, only real love true love enuine love will work. Why cant people see that? Its so sad and many people, especially the women end up getting hurt and back to being lonely with little money, lots of time and low self esteem.
 

maria1

New Member
I think i am getting mixed up/confused, i am posting to different comments, yet i seem to be finding them all over the place, no offense, sorry., think i will go and have a cup of coffee.
 

maria1

New Member
lover rats continued

I reply to threads and i post them, but then i cant see them or find them, 8i am not very good with this. I am just so sad that this sort of thing is happening all of the time, or thats how it seems, sad for the desperate young men, and why so desperate, they wont find happiness like that, and sad for the vulnerable older ladies that are being used, why so need? they wont find happines either, only genuine tru real love will bring happiness, and then there needs to be so much more also, as love is wonderful, being in love is exciting and mad and lovely, but loving is forever, and it takes just that bit more than love to make a relationship last forever.
best wishes
ps i said i was going off to have coffe, i need a break
 

CeeCee

Active Member
I'm not sad.lonely or desperate.I am older than my Tunisian boyfriend ,but we have had this argument before.Why do people assume that it can't be real love if the woman is older than her man.And yet again we get to the point that it is deemed ok if the man is older than the woman.Everyone deserves a stab at happiness,regardless of age.My english ex husband turned out to be one of the biggest rats you could ever hope to meet.Why shouldn't I or any of the other older ladies on here have a chance to find love and happiness again.just because our men are young and Tunisian doesn't mean they are sad or desperate.I know of many english young men that also prefer older ladies to ones of their own age.Does that make them sad and desperate too? Sorry, but I get so sick of this older women/younger men bashing.
 

skele

Well-Known Member
Ah yes...these poor, sad, desperate, lonely women. Don't they know that once they reach 30 they become useless, unattractive and should never leave the house again? When will these silly creatures learn that they are past it and that no one will ever really want them?!:p:eek::p
 

katT1

Member
Hi everybody

This is a general reply to the original posts - I have been going to Tunisia for 35years and the problems with Tunisian young men/European women are nothing new! Only now we have the internet and sites like this where people now openly discuss things. Niez/Black Mamba DO NOT BE ASHAMED OF TUNISIANS = these young men are mostly very weak and the women in their thrall are as Maria1 says desparate. You will find young men and women like these all over the world not just Tunisia. I know of 2 Scots men who married American women in order to get their green cards. They are both now divorced.

KatT1
 

aljaye

Well-Known Member
I tried to post a quick reply, but it seems to have got lost.
I think it is very very sad thatthee are such desperate peole out there, desperate for whatever are their reasons, to lie and cheat and get into a position that they THINK OR BELIEVE will be better for them. Okay we all want to try to better ourselves, all want to try and get out from a negative situation, but for young men to believe that by lying and cheating and manipulating a woman, he will bring about his own happiness. He wont, it cant happen, when things are not right, not genuine, it cant bring about happiness, it may well bring about change, and perhaps thats all these young guys are looking for, change and a chance to move on. This then is very sad for the women that they use, and yes, i realise its mainly the older women. Again perhaps a bit of desperation, time on their hands, lonely, a little money to spend, VULNERABLE. Surely common sense should come into the arena. I see nothing wrong with age difference, whatever the ***, orientation, class, race, religion, culture, all of these taboos can be overcome if two peole genuinely love each other. This is the crux of the matter, although we all have reasons, only real love true love enuine love will work. Why cant people see that? Its so sad and many people, especially the women end up getting hurt and back to being lonely with little money, lots of time and low self esteem.
A tale from the other side. My BFs mate told me I was the first girl to go and visit him and he was panic struck before I got there. I'm not daft I probably wont be the last and he probably has some numbers tucked away..but when I was letting doubt rear its ugly head his friend said "This is the problem. I have had foreign girlfriends and in the end I say to them get lost because they never trust and they question everything I do. It was not worth it for me,and as I didnt want to get married they thought I was using them and wanted their money." This from an intelligent guy who speaks four languages and has a degree.
So put the shoe on the other foot, young Tunisia man works all the hours fgod send for peanuts doesnt have enough money to keep a pretty Tunisan prima donna happy so he meets Tourist girls. He likes them, they like him..yes maybe *** comes into it..because they have done this he thnks they REALLY like him..then they give him their numbers,,say tearful goodbyes and go home to Joe Fred Bob Herman whoever. So he begins next time by saying "Do you have BF or husband at home?" becasue he's found out the hard way that the tourists cant be trusted either.
So then he meets someone older..and finds that she isnt out for a quick exciting fling on holidays..in fact shes after nothing in particular just a good holiday.. but someone genuine with a lot of love to give..and he finds himself happy with her..whats wrong with that??
Nothing. it doesnt make the woman sad or desperate or anything else..it just makes her LUCKY!
 

CeeCee

Active Member
Well put Aljaye!!..xx :)
 

marie59

Banned
Great someone agrees that all older women are not desperate and stupid
Well said Aljaye
 

the highlander

Active Member
hi Aljaye
i totally agree that older women are not desparate, its not an age thing, but most women are a wee bit niave
why do i say this mmmm lets see . its a holiday nothing more, (well not unless your are acctually going out there on the pull) the main difference that age brings is that most younger females are going for fun you might say
and i have said before if thats what you want and both dont want afters then fine.
but please dont say that some of what happens is not planned by the so called rat.
you mentioned about the girls going home to tom **** or and because of this the guy asks if she has a bf back home
well from personal expeirience that dont stop them
the lass i have spoken about was asked if she had a bf and she said yes (did that put him off? NO) she asked him and his reply was that he broke up with his gf 2 weeks before (hahah how very convienient) which turn out to be a lie cause i then found out he had another 3, 2 english and a german lady sending money all being told "your my queen and come back to tunisia.
the ladies are only niave because i have said before they fall for it, all sense and senisbility goes out the window and i do believe that they they guys do it that often that they have it down to a fine art
holiday romances or 1night stands go on all over the world its the afters that annoy me where these so called romances are concerned.
all the best
highlander
 

feefad

Well-Known Member
the lass i have spoken about was asked if she had a bf and she said yes (did that put him off? NO)
Hairy, with you on this. My wedding ring never puts any of them off which is frustrating at times. What does make them back off is when hubby comes over and they realise he is Tunisian, no idea what he says but they dont come near me after that.... or maybe I smell ;)
 

CeeCee

Active Member
Wearing a wedding ring doesn't put any man off these days, and they don't have to be tunisian either.While i was married I had been asked out several times by men who didnt care that i was married.In fact some even say 'that's ok, so am I'.I never took any of them up on their offer I might say.And this was from english men.Oh, and not all relationships with Tunisian men stems from a holiday romance.People meet under many different circumstances...
 

feefad

Well-Known Member
good point christy, i work with a guy that wouldnt think twice if someone was married. His attitude is its her thats married and doing wrong not me!! Needless to say I let him know all the time how disgusting i think that attitude is :)
 

the highlander

Active Member
fee fad
heres another lol
there were 2 or 3 all sniffing around the lass on the 1st week (excuse the term) but as soon as she "went for a walk " with one of them the rest backed off
strange?
thats why i say its not love cause if i fancied a lass do you think i would back off just cause a work mate got in
its like ok she is mine now the rest of you target somebody else
lol
all the best
highlander
 

aljaye

Well-Known Member
hi Aljaye
i totally agree that older women are not desparate, its not an age thing, but most women are a wee bit niave
why do i say this mmmm lets see . its a holiday nothing more, (well not unless your are acctually going out there on the pull) the main difference that age brings is that most younger females are going for fun you might say
and i have said before if thats what you want and both dont want afters then fine.
but please dont say that some of what happens is not planned by the so called rat.
you mentioned about the girls going home to tom **** or and because of this the guy asks if she has a bf back home
well from personal expeirience that dont stop them
the lass i have spoken about was asked if she had a bf and she said yes (did that put him off? NO) she asked him and his reply was that he broke up with his gf 2 weeks before (hahah how very convienient) which turn out to be a lie cause i then found out he had another 3, 2 english and a german lady sending money all being told "your my queen and come back to tunisia.
the ladies are only niave because i have said before they fall for it, all sense and senisbility goes out the window and i do believe that they they guys do it that often that they have it down to a fine art
holiday romances or 1night stands go on all over the world its the afters that annoy me where these so called romances are concerned.
all the best
highlander
But as long as she did nothing about it wheres the problem? No different to being out in a British pub where men slip the wedding ring off to go on the pull and the women for that matter! He may have been peristent but in words only..I doubt very much that he started groping her backside when she walked past! Okay he was a liar ( he is after all a male it seems inbred no offence to you)..and if she had a boyfriend why was she doing anything but laughing at him..or was she after a bit of holiday fun herself in reality?
Every coin has two sides..it just gets forgotten sometimes
It doesnt matter how well a "Rat" planned his attack,,unless I wanted him he wouldnt get further than his hole!
 

the highlander

Active Member
ok see your point but here you go
1st time with him he says " i have a condom " to which she said " i am not a cheap ****" and walked away
2nd time in his company he asked her to disco in soouse and wanted her to pay for everything he said he had left his wallet
3rd time he said he wanted to go for walk to say sorry
on walk he did his usual charm offensive but at the end she had to physically fight him off
i think he thought oh she is going home tomorrow and i want in her knickers
anyways all through this u may say why go back or talk to him but like mentioned on here many times by others
they turn on the charm and she thought he was in gerneral an ok guy
even a member on here has said the say that the guy in question comes across as a really nice guy
then you get home and the little boy charm gets turned on the oh i miss u you are mine
i will treat you like a queen
u may be stronger than the person in question
i agree
that has been my whole point none of this should be happening cause they are so apparent
but it does over and over
with mild to severe consequences
the only thing that stopped it was when i answered the phone and he dissapeared down his hole probably waiting for next victim
oh and btw this was at xmas day and i have since found a pic taken in early jan with him and 2 ladies
so much for his broken heart
 

Dolly

Active Member
Hmmmmmmm...........I am older than my husband, we live in tunisia. I was in the supermarket and was being followed by a French man.......a French man.........not a Tunisian man...............FRENCH!! It doesn't have to be harrassment by just Tunisian men you know!
 

bobby g

Well-Known Member
I never seem to get this hassle from men !!!! note to self...why the hell not!!! Must be my "I'm not available attitude". Or maybe as I'm not interested don't always notice the signs, could never get the hang of flirting. I was more for the direct approach. LOL
 

aljaye

Well-Known Member
ok see your point but here you go
1st time with him he says " i have a condom " to which she said " i am not a cheap ****" and walked away
2nd time in his company he asked her to disco in soouse and wanted her to pay for everything he said he had left his wallet
3rd time he said he wanted to go for walk to say sorry
on walk he did his usual charm offensive but at the end she had to physically fight him off
i think he thought oh she is going home tomorrow and i want in her knickers
anyways all through this u may say why go back or talk to him but like mentioned on here many times by others
they turn on the charm and she thought he was in gerneral an ok guy
even a member on here has said the say that the guy in question comes across as a really nice guy
then you get home and the little boy charm gets turned on the oh i miss u you are mine
i will treat you like a queen
u may be stronger than the person in question
i agree
that has been my whole point none of this should be happening cause they are so apparent
but it does over and over
with mild to severe consequences
the only thing that stopped it was when i answered the phone and he dissapeared down his hole probably waiting for next victim
oh and btw this was at xmas day and i have since found a pic taken in early jan with him and 2 ladies
so much for his broken heart

Highlander you must be a sweet guy cos this tale smells a little like the cowbarn sorry. Would any of the ladies on here want to stay in touch with a man they had to PHYSICALLY fight off..I know what he would have had from me..a fist in the face and a knee where it hurts. Doesnt matter how MUCH charm he turned on later Id be thinking get lost jerk. I wouldn even have given him my number.
And if the words you quoted were his words to her on the first night why the hell did she even go for a walk with him..hes not exactly subtle is he!!
IM NOT DEFENDING HIM ..but surely NO woman is that silly to actually get tangled up with someone like that?
And didnt she have a boyfriend at home anyway? I dont know her but on paper sounds a bit like played with the fire and got burned..dont like it now!

Doesnt matter how much charm they have if I dont want its tough..and if onithe forst evening with someone he had said that and Id walked away I certainly wouldsnt have gone back for more...and thats nothing to do with being strong its to do with pride.
 
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