Just met a lovely guy from Tunisia

Sammysmith

New Member
#1
Hello everyone

II'm just waiting a bit of advice if that's ok
I just been on holiday to Tunisia and met a gorgeous guy while I was there
He was working in the hotel so we kept bumping into each other
We talked a lot and got to know a bit about each other
Went for a walk on the beach for a couple of hours one night
He told me how I made him feel (which was great)
He has asked me to move over there as he knows that him coming to England is very very hard if not impossible
Iv been doing a lot of research while iv been home and it does seem to be extremely hard to move to England so iv been thinking about moving out there (I'm quite impulsive)
We talk every night and we get on so well and I really do feel like I'm falling for this sweet guy
Iv a 13 year old son that would be coming with me (he wants to)
Can anyone living in Tunisia with a partner that has taken their children with them please advice on education over there as that is a high factor if we go or not
I need to know his education won't be held back?
Also what kind of job would I be able to get with only talking English?

Now I take people as I find them and believe what they say and this guy makes me feel like I'm the only girl in the world (no English man has done this)
But everyone iv told back in England have been negative about this adorable man I have met
Sadly they say he doesn't mean what he says and he just wants to come to England and I'm his ticket over

But after reading what I have and how hard it is to come to England I'm confused as to why people are negative about him

Please if anyone has advice on anything it will be much appreciated

Kind regards
 

Kris

Administrator
Staff member
#2
"Can anyone living in Tunisia with a partner that has taken their children with them please advice on education over there as that is a high factor if we go or not"

Its money at the end of the day i am not saying the education system is bad in Tunisia but all my in laws regardless of how skint they are seem to be either sending their kids to a fee paying school or at least topping up.

At 13 its a NO WAY for me only a few years until GCSEs unless you have a lot of money and you are going to enrol him in an english speaking school with the diplomats children.

Some questions....

Are you much older than him?

What was his job in the hotel owner, manager, head chef, restaurant manager ie serious professional....... or life guard/animator etc


Also what kind of job would I be able to get with only talking English?

None most likely TBH and even if you did the money would be not enough to live on.

But after reading what I have and how hard it is to come to England I'm confused as to why people are negative about him

It's not statistically hard as you only need to earn £18,000 odd which is a full time 40 hour job on minimum wage. Hard for some I have no doubt but for a lot of people it is doable.

I love Tunisia but it has a reputation for romeos think Thailand for men now swap that around the other way and you get the idea.

Have a look at Tunisianloverats.com and type in you hotel and loves name...... a possibility he may be on there.

Also watch this film old but good


and the following


 
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Sammysmith

New Member
#3
Thank you for your reply
As for the school I don't have a lot of money at all so what your saying is don't send him to a school in Tunisia unless I'm rich and can afford to pay for a international education?

His job is selling trips/days out so I know its not a great wage
He does that in summer then works on the olive farm his parents have through winter

I am 45 and he is 31 iv had bigger age gaps with past partners in England so I don't see this as a problem?

As for me and working I didn't think there would be much out their for me as I only speak English
So I asked this question to my partner last night and he was going to look into what we could do for work together
He was talking about a restaurant or some kind of tourist business as he works doing this now he would know that side of things

Iv read a few things on loverats I found it hard to read as there must be genuine men in Tunisia..... Just like any country you will get good and bad people (England has more than its fair share) but I will take another look and put in the hotel even tho he doesn't work for the hotel itself

It all sounds very disappointing I was hoping for positive feedback on something but thank you for your advice

Sammy
 

magic

Member
#4
Major red flags! What’s the hurry ,you’ve only just met ! Would you move this fast with an English guy? No . How can you love someone after meeting them once? He has an ulterior motive ,to use you for a visa and anything else he can get his hands on. People are sceptical for good reason! The age gap for one is a big no no over there. Sorry I don’t say what you want to hear,but believe me ,run while you can and focus on your son .How can you decide a future with someone you met on holiday!
 

Sammysmith

New Member
#5
Major red flags! What’s the hurry ,you’ve only just met ! Would you move this fast with an English guy? No . How can you love someone after meeting them once? He has an ulterior motive ,to use you for a visa and anything else he can get his hands on. People are sceptical for good reason! The age gap for one is a big no no over there. Sorry I don’t say what you want to hear,but believe me ,run while you can and focus on your son .How can you decide a future with someone you met on holiday!
Hi thank you for your message
I said I'm thinking about moving out there I'm not getting the first plane I can
I'm going over in November on my own to spend the week with him and probably a few times early next year also
So I'm not in a major rush I'm just planning ahead with some questions that are important as to when I make my mind up If I will definitely go with my boy
I also didn't say I'm in love with him but falling for a very sweet kind guy
I do believe in love at first sight tho

I also moved in with my childrens dad after 4 weeks and we had 3 gorgeous boys and was married for 21 years so it can work if you haven't been together long
Conflicting views on the age gap iv heard some (both English and Tunisian) say the age gap does matter and some say it doesn't so iv no idea still about this

So please advice on why he said he has no chance of coming to England and laughed when I said come for a week? Until HE explained to me how hard it was to leave the country even for a week and he had no chance of a visa?
Is that the normal way for getting a visa from a English person?
If you could advise on that because all I see is someone being genuine about staying in his own country

Many thanks
 

Kris

Administrator
Staff member
#6
Thank you for your reply
As for the school I don't have a lot of money at all so what your saying is don't send him to a school in Tunisia unless I'm rich and can afford to pay for a international education?

What I am saying is the system seems to not be that great at the moment.

My wife and her brothers went to regular school but the latest generation of kids (my nephews and nieces) seem to be going to semi private/private schools despite the family not having much money.

Your son will most likely want to come back to the UK to work given the nepotism and unemployment in Tunisia. Then when he comes back he will need a good qualification to get a job back here in the UK.


His job is selling trips/days out so I know its not a great wage
He does that in summer then works on the olive farm his parents have through winter

That will be terrible money then most likely sub 1000 dinars which is 250-350 £ a month. He most likely would know poverty you would find hard to comprehend.

I am 45 and he is 31 iv had bigger age gaps with past partners in England so I don't see this as a problem?

It is in Tunisia unfortunately he will most likely not understand that you wont have loads of money (by his standards) the deal is that he cannot survive on his wages in Tunisia and you have the role as an older woman of at best helping at worst being a meal ticket.

Tunisia is patriarchal and men like younger women and their own children. Its sadly not uncommon for the plan to go from poor > marry "rich" older foreign lady and then as soon as the visa is done > marry a 19 year old from the same village. Sometimes the family and even the Tunisian fiancee have been in on it and sisters have turned out to be their girlfriends.


As for me and working I didn't think there would be much out their for me as I only speak English
So I asked this question to my partner last night and he was going to look into what we could do for work together
He was talking about a restaurant or some kind of tourist business as he works doing this now he would know that side of things

Most likely you pay for it and then adios (it will have to be in his name) it is very difficult to make this type of business work. He could earn more money working in a restaurant maybe a larger one would pay him 2/3 times he current wage and he could have experience of running it for when he starts his own.... But nope he most likely knows that working as a waiter is not great for meeting women. A cafe is one of the most risky business going and as someone in that trade in the UK.... Tunisian rents and sale prices are comparably higher than the UK you can make money but you have to either be lucky with a location or pay silly money for it.

If I had a £ for every Tunisian I know who dreams of having a cafe.... its like a UK bloke wanting a pub because he likes to sit in one all day.


Iv read a few things on loverats I found it hard to read as there must be genuine men in Tunisia..... Just like any country you will get good and bad people (England has more than its fair share) but I will take another look and put in the hotel even tho he doesn't work for the hotel itself

I have met people who are. But that is a small % so my advice is to know how it all works and then with open eyes see how it goes.

Never ever give up your life, job, benefits, child's education to be with a man of no means in another country. Take it slow .....


It all sounds very disappointing I was hoping for positive feedback on something but thank you for your advice

Put it this in a hypothetical way I am 40 odd bloke..... and I am your friend.

I go on holiday to Thailand and meet a lady 14 years younger than me and i say the same things you have said to us on here.

What would your advice to me be when I say she wants me to move over there and start a restaurant for her and move my 13 year old daughter with me?

I dont want to sound like a misogynist but i think men can compartmentalise sex from love and although I am sure that there are plenty of old fools out there, a lot of men know the score money = hot young woman, no money = no hot young woman. Thats why I feel Bezeness is worse than the Man in Thailand scenario as I dont feel the majority of victims actually understand whats going on "know the score" so to speak.

Also do not think the I want to stay in Tunisia scenario is a stamp of authenticity...... There is move to the UK bezness, get a business/anything in Tunisia bezness and have kids with foreigners and get money off them when they get older bezeness.

I never believed the last one until I saw the documentary bezness as usual which amazed me as i never saw a Tunisian man ever act like that.

My experience is of parents who would starve to get their son a education/car or anything to give them a head start.
 
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magic

Member
#7
Hi thank you for your message
I said I'm thinking about moving out there I'm not getting the first plane I can
I'm going over in November on my own to spend the week with him and probably a few times early next year also
So I'm not in a major rush I'm just planning ahead with some questions that are important as to when I make my mind up If I will definitely go with my boy
I also didn't say I'm in love with him but falling for a very sweet kind guy
I do believe in love at first sight tho

I also moved in with my childrens dad after 4 weeks and we had 3 gorgeous boys and was married for 21 years so it can work if you haven't been together long
Conflicting views on the age gap iv heard some (both English and Tunisian) say the age gap does matter and some say it doesn't so iv no idea still about this

So please advice on why he said he has no chance of coming to England and laughed when I said come for a week? Until HE explained to me how hard it was to leave the country even for a week and he had no chance of a visa?
Is that the normal way for getting a visa from a English person?
If you could advise on that because all I see is someone being genuine about staying in his own country

Many thanks
For Tunisian men to get a visa,even when married to a European is very,very hard ,and will get harder after brexit . Some couples wait years to be together. And these are couples of the same age ,kids together etc . When they see a big age gap they will think it’s bezness,and he probably never will get a visa. Also,YOU need to be earning £18,600 a year to even apply! Visit visas are notoriously hard to get,because the man has to prove he will go back! They are like a needle in a haystack. This is just the tip of the iceberg,then there are cultural differences, and ultimately,is he genuine?
 

MO2915

Member
#8
Hello everyone

II'm just waiting a bit of advice if that's ok
I just been on holiday to Tunisia and met a gorgeous guy while I was there
He was working in the hotel so we kept bumping into each other
We talked a lot and got to know a bit about each other
Went for a walk on the beach for a couple of hours one night
He told me how I made him feel (which was great)
He has asked me to move over there as he knows that him coming to England is very very hard if not impossible
Iv been doing a lot of research while iv been home and it does seem to be extremely hard to move to England so iv been thinking about moving out there (I'm quite impulsive)
We talk every night and we get on so well and I really do feel like I'm falling for this sweet guy
Iv a 13 year old son that would be coming with me (he wants to)
Can anyone living in Tunisia with a partner that has taken their children with them please advice on education over there as that is a high factor if we go or not
I need to know his education won't be held back?
Also what kind of job would I be able to get with only talking English?

Now I take people as I find them and believe what they say and this guy makes me feel like I'm the only girl in the world (no English man has done this)
But everyone iv told back in England have been negative about this adorable man I have met
Sadly they say he doesn't mean what he says and he just wants to come to England and I'm his ticket over

But after reading what I have and how hard it is to come to England I'm confused as to why people are negative about him

Please if anyone has advice on anything it will be much appreciated

Kind regards
What Kris and Magic are saying is generally true unfortunately. As a Tunisian myself, I do not want to judge your situation or blame your guy but I would advise you to go on holidays to understand and learn more about him and his life then make your mind up. There's no rush any way, marriage, UK visa etc. will take years and money to sort out.
 
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